So unsure. I also didn’t get a new phone. Sucks.
Are we out of the woods yet?
Finally in bed after a quick chat with my flatmate. He just came back from work.
i am so jealous of all the people who are comfortable with who they are physically and mentally
literally just bailed on the race 20minutes ago officially and i have major FOMO but i want a 1st more than anything and it’s time to get my head screwed on and be more sensible. my coach is going to hate me when he finds out. speaking to hannah has cleared my head. she’s so right. i don’t just want to be mediocre at it all. sacrifices are to be made,
Thank you for coming to see me and giving me courage to face reality. Life is just that life and there are highs and lows amongst them. I just need to focus on the positives. Carpe diem.
& I’m okay. Yet not okay at the same time.
Is all I want..once in a while. Now I may have just screwed it all up…However I’m happy that I was brave enough to just say what was on my mind. The waiting game begins once again…
I was sitting somewhere perhaps home/office.. Hot seating office. However it was in the future - a dystopian future. You after a bit of staring from a distance came and suddenly you were there in front of me. Came home with me after a wander of the ‘office’ but it was an odd place. I was mad but I wasn’t showing me being mad. You ate fish ? However it was a very odd way of cooking. Like just pressing a few buttons… As I was making it you facetimed but it was more normal just as if like it was just a phonecall - to your mum and your voice went slightly Welsh as you introduced me. You were saying things to her as if you wanted me to hear them. but i know I was mad but not mad enough to be screaming and shouting. you got off the phone and then i think i raised the issue. i said you can’t just leave me like that and now I’m awake and I find out you’ve finally replied and although we most definitely aren’t in a dystopian world however how i feel in my dream directly correlates to how i feel right now.
lost. confused. anxious but happy. why am i happy?
+ they make me happy.